Lunar Orbiter - Crash Landing

Spacex toys are for me a story of tragedy and triumph, much like the actual history of the Nasa Lunar Orbiter. I came upon my toy about 8 years ago, on ebay. The seller was from Tri-ang's home town of Merton and had listed it as a carded, complete and slightly battered toy. At the same time, he listed a Nasa Glider, but as I had one of these already, I concentrated on the Orbiter. During the week of the auction, I pestered the seller with questions, which he dutifully answered. He had apparently found both items at a local car boot and no, he didn't have any more. He wasn't apparently aware of what they were and listed them as described on the card, without the usual appellations of "WOW" "Rare" "Please Look!" or "Loft Find" etc, which always manage to set my teeth on edge and make me resist looking.

After the usual nail biting finale, the glider whizzed off into the ether for silly money and I fought my way through to buy the Orbiter for - at the time - a stiff £45. I was happy, I'd won another rarity, complete with accessories on the card and including the badge. I hopped around the room, singing as I hit the paypal button. Some time later, I got the dispatch note and waited patiently, the few days, for the post to arrive.

It came at the weekend and I sat poised, waiting for postman Pat to bring me a nice little box full of bubblewrap with the holy of holies resting inside. Instead, the letterbox clanged shut with a deathly knell and a battered jiffy bag flopped onto the mat like a dead fish.

Not only was the bag battered, it was torn and actually open. My heart sank as I noticed the postcode and tore open the envelope. Inside, without any interior wrapping was my Orbiter. Having worked in a postal sorting office, I know the rigours of the sorting system and it was clear that my parcel had been forcibly subjected to the intense scrutiny of every single, rough handed step of the process, including apparently being used as a cushion for the slightly overweight van driver who had delivered it personally to my door.

It wasn't pleasant. The already fatigued blister had given way and cracked open, allowing one of the two precious aerials to escape into the envelope, which had then been liberated somewhere between here and the south of England onto the floor of some royal mail property. The whole vehicle was crushed, the circular ring around the fuel tanks had broken and the central mount was pressed down onto the main body. It was clear now that the seller was obviously not a discerning ebayer who took pride in his transactions, but a random scally who had just made the price of a couple of pairs of new Airmax from some overenthusiastic northern monkey.

I was livid. Logging on to ebay, I messaged a carefully worded complaint about his lack of care in packing. No response. Wiping away tears of heartbreak and anguish, I considered some inflammatory negative feedback for the deal, but the possibility of more Spacex appearing from the same seller stayed my hand. Nothing else ever appeared and mercifully, nobody else has been so mindless in packaging since.